Brene Brown and the Beginning of My Journey to Whole-hearted Living

Driving home from California a year ago, Justin and I happened to catch a TED Radio Hour called "Making Mistakes". The whole episode was fantastic , but one part in particular stood out to me. It was an interview with Brene Brown who is a social worker, researcher, and author currently at the University of Houston. In her brief portion on the episode, I was struck by what she said about vulnerability. In short, vulnerability is scary to us, so we find ways to hide our vulnerability, whether it be through perfectionism, shaming others,etc. What these defense mechanisms (hate to use that cliche term) do ultimately, is keep us from real connections with others and separate us from our authentic self. Her words struck me deeply, so much so that I tried to ignore what she said for a year!

I returned to her work in an indirect way through a parenting book a friend had repeatedly recommended to me called "The Gifts of Imperfect Parenting". I am constantly looking for new parenting advice, so I eventually got the book on Audible and listened to it while I got ready. Yes, it taught me quite a lot about how to be a better parent, but in a bottom-up way where the change that makes me a good parent does not come from applying some new discipline technique, rather it comes from making real changes within me that influence my whole world; including how I parent.

This book rocked my world! It exposed me to some very painful truths about myself and the ways I cover them. After finishing this book, I moved into her audio lecture series, also on Audible, The Power of Vulnerability. I just finished it yesterday and still feel in a bit of a daze about what she said. In short, she walks the listener through 10 "guideposts" that come directly from her research with wholehearted people. They are

•  Authenticity:  letting go of what people think
• Self-compassion:  letting go of perfectionism
• A resilient spirit:  letting go of numbing and powerlessness
• Gratitude and joy:  letting go of scarcity and fear
• Intuition and trusting faith:  letting go of the need for certainty
• Creativity:  letting go of comparison
• Play and rest:  letting go of exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self-worth
• Calm and stillness:  letting go of anxiety as a lifestyle
• Meaningful work:  letting go of self-doubt
• Laughter, song and dance:  letting go of being cool and “always in control.

Another line of blog posts I am going to start is my journey in working on these different guideposts. Suprisingly, I am not afraid to broadcast this journey to the world. I feel that Dr. Brown is right when she said shame needs three things to grow: secrecy, silence, and judgement. I want to feel with my whole heart and live life fully. That is why I have begun the uncomfortable walk toward authenticity.

If you are not familiar with Dr. Brown's work, here are a few links to get you started:

Her original TED talk: "The Power of Vulnerability"

Her second TED talk: "Listening to Shame"

The Parenting Manifesto

Shame needs three things to grow: secrecy, silence, and judgment. - See more at: http://jodiegale.com/brene-brown-15-takeaways-from-the-power-of-being-enough-live-talk-in-sydney/#sthash.FW3v8oTY.dpuf

Shame needs three things to grow: secrecy, silence, and judgment. - See more at: http://jodiegale.com/brene-brown-15-takeaways-from-the-power-of-being-enough-live-talk-in-sydney/#sthash.FW3v8oTY.dpuf

Shame needs three things to grow: secrecy, silence, and judgment. - See more at: http://jodiegale.com/brene-brown-15-takeaways-from-the-power-of-being-enough-live-talk-in-sydney/#sthash.FW3v8oTY.dpuf